So we have completed most of the recording. I am actually in the car driving up from Corvallis back to Portland with Tobias. We are very happy with the way that everything turned out. We had one all out brawl that was recorded but we think we will fade out before you hear the crunching of bones. We also completed “mikey j is a homo” which was written a few months back and even performed, but never recorded. For those who don’t know mikey j he is a friend of the Australian persuasion but unlike whittler, we hate mikey j because he has no understanding of music or reality. I hope that he likes it. We actually wrote a song on site and recorded it. It was a great chord progression that Wallace had written and Tobias and I added a heroic saga about the life of Gummy McGee. She is a toothless prostitute from Dinkle County that gives great head. It is a beautiful number for the whole family to enjoy. We have another installment in the frog chief saga that is sure to please. It not only involves frogs but also fart noises. We got some great photos of the production process that I will post. Tomorrow Wallace and I are going to meet up with lo’b and lay down some drum tracks. Anyone who has the cd knows that he has done percussion on the two prior recordings and this one will be no different. All in all we had a great time and it is all leading up to the charity show on January 15th. We will have free copies of the new ep for everyone and it will all be online soon. Keep it perverted kids and don’t let the man in the windowless van butt rape you!

p.s. from Tobias:
Don’t worry about me guys, my dick is still huge. Saying the word dick still makes me laugh.


here is elephant ears studio were we do most of our recording.

Wallace and I hashing shit out.

"tbone, you need to pay more attention to me. Look me in the eye when im talking to you"
"are you talking tobias?"

this is a little graph that shows the relationship between being an asshole and a man's penis size. I also indicated where wally falls and were I fall in regards to this relationship (with all other variables being held constant).

I think Wallace might have had a little too much eggnog and not enough love from his parents when he was growing up. Here is a little graph explaining why Wallace is always drunker then he should be:

here it is. I was able to scan, resize, and post. I will not comment until tomorrow. Merry christmas!

So I finally got my new computer. I am so excited! I have a new wireless router and all these new programs to install and things are great! I will be able to be plugged in everywhere that I go and I think that will benefit everyone because I will be able to give my opinion to everyone in a very timely fashion.
In other news I wanted to continue some discourse on the idea of the pros and cons of social welfare programs. Poster works in the field of social work and probably has some good insight into things. I just got back to Portland and every thing is much worse. My step-dad was just telling me about how a panhandler just got shot in Portland when he got too aggressive asking for change from a crazy man. The city continues to throw more money at the problem. Why the police let this aggressive begging continue is beyond me and why we encourage programs that continue to enable these folks doesn't make any sense. I wanted to specifically discuss this idea of minimum wage. I drew up a graph that you can see here:



what I am showing is how minimum wage, which is a widely accepted idea, actually creates a loss of jobs. There are more people who want to work then firms are willing to hire. At the point where the two lines intersect is the point were everyone who is willing to work is working for everyone that is willing to pay them. This is an equilibrium were everyone is happy. The people who are not working chose to do so. The shaded green area is the loss jobs that resulted from the minimum wage. These people are now not adding to the market place and are not participating in the the giving and taking that enables everyone to live outside of what they are able to produce for themselves. In Portland we used to have one of the highest minimum wages in the country and at the same time had the highest unemployment rate in the country. I kept asking people if they thought the two were related and they usually stared at me blankly, smiled and said "will i don't see how that relates, we are talking about un-employment, not a minimum wage. Everyone knows that you need a minimum wage or those evil men in big business will not pay them anything at all and they will starve."
What poster does is very admirable and was something I myself was thinking about going into. I have many friends in the sociology department that are going to continue in the field and I think that what they do is very difficult and under appreciated. I decided that I was not able to do this and left it to the fine people like poster. But these issues are issues that people forget to think about. When they vote to increase minimum wage they don't realize that they are actually creating a job shortage and people who want to work will not be able to. I hope some people have something to add to this discussion.

This is tbone. I am totally stressed out this week so I may come off a little scatter brained. I have three things to say:

A: I just read on article from the Portland tribune that made me very angry. In Portland there is a huge problem with homeless youth, youth on drugs, and homeless youth on drugs getting pregnant. It is a growing problem and it just seems to be getting worse. The article was about this girl who just had a kid and is living in government subsidized housing and "trying to get back on her feet." She went on and on about how it is not fair that rich people get to experience all the happiness and she deserves to be taken care of. The problem in Portland is that everyone seems to buy into this idea and gladly spend tax dollars to help support these "crack families". (I am sure it wasn't a rich person who originally thought of the handout ideal.) Then the local government sits and scratches it's head and can't figure out why the problem is growing. I will tell you why it is growing. It is growing because you are encouraging this behavior. They know that in Portland the streets are paved with food stamps and the spare change from working folks pockets seems to fall from the sky. You just have to go pick it off the welfare tree. They flock to Portland and Portland responds by trying to INCREASE spending on these projects. It makes me sick when people try to tell me that I have a responsibility to support people who fucked up their own fucking lives.

B: I read a great Dave Berry article the other day. He was talking about the great red and blue rift that is in America these days. I have to admit that it is very true. When I talk to friends of mine I have noticed that more and more people say that they hate this country. They say that they want to move to Canada. We don't need to hate this country. We just need to work on making it better. That is what is good about were we live. It can change. We had slavery and women couldn't vote but we fixed that. We had Nixon as president at one time and we fixed that. Don't say you hate this country; just say that you are going to do your best to push this country in the right direction. And in reference to the people who want to go to Canada: 43% of all Canadians (that is 8 Canadians) are eaten by polar bears every year. That is not a fear that I can live with.

C: I am excited because for Christmas I bought myself a new laptop. I ordered it on line so I haven't received it yet. I also got the wireless router and so I wont have to use the community apartment computer any longer. I also wont have to fix the community apartment computer when it breaks or picks up a virus. I will be able to sit on the couch, watch TV , and look at porn all at the same time!

So last night I went to the beermitzfah that I attend on Thursdays and, as usual, had a great time. I went with my east coast musical counterpart and her friend. This was the first time I met her friend I found her to be very entertaining. That is besides the point. My real point here is that I came up with a great bumper sticker idea. It would read "WOMEN SHOULD VOTE RIGHT". There is so many meanings implied that it takes a while for you to wrap your brain around the magnitude of this statement. It could be understood to mean "women should vote, right?" or "women should vote correctly" or "women should vote for the right wing of politics". I own this and I am going to make millions off of it because it spans the whole political spectrum. Feminist will buy it, conservatives will buy it, and even those young "vote or die" folks will buy it. Mark one up for tbone!

This is what we call in the business an "action shot". This is again a bottle of okocim and you can still download the song for free. Yes free! this is for a limited time so tell you friends about okocim beer and the cute little diddy that those zany guys in The Good Flame sing!

This is a picture of me drinking a medium size bottle of okocim. You can hear a song about it at http://www.thegoodflame.com/audio1.htm. It is song number 22 entitled "the polish drinking song". I love this beer and it always gets me were I need to be.

Why are drug stores so impossible? I always find myself with a few extra minutes and I say to myself "I will just pop into rite aid and buy that toothpaste that I need". It never works out that way. The line is always a million miles long and there is some lady named rolandamisha and the end taking her sweet time. It drives me nuts. Then she calls for assistance at the register and the manager, usually named bill, shows up in his cheap tie that he obviously stole from the store and starts ringing people up but it never goes any quicker. A drug store pit stop is guaranteed to take at least 14 times al long as it should. Fuck that!