I have the cure for a hang over. It is a process of making you smarter the morning after so you eventually reach the level of intelligence you had the night before. First, you need to find some things that make you smarter. Three things that make you smarter are: listening to Frank Zappa, doing the daily crossword on a daily basis, and reading something, anything (the back of the shampoo bottle will work). To cure a hang-over wake up and get out of bed. (This is the most difficult step). Go and buy and cup of coffee and your favorite daily. Put on your favorite Zappa album. (For hangovers I suggest a later seventies album like Joes garage or overnight sensation.). Do the crossword as you drink your coffee and listen to the soothing music. When you get stuck with the crossword, read something. The paper that was included with your daily crossword is a great option! After reading something, continue doing the crossword. Frank Zappa needs to be on throughout the process. If you are still hung over put on some King Crimson from the eighties. Anything earlier will not work for the process unless you are skilled at curing a hangover and you know the early crimson that will work for you. Nap on your back with the crossword on your chest. Wake up and complete the crossword after putting Zappa back on. If this does not work I suggest calling off all plans for your day and to start drinking again.

Every day I feel like a bum. I have to go rummaging in the garbage of my building because SOMEONE keeps throwing my newspaper away. I wake up, get dressed, and head downstairs with my man purse, all set to accept the new day of news and everyday it is sitting in the trash. I will admit that sometimes I don’t get downstairs until after 10 am but that is no excuse for someone to throw my favorite daily away. It comes every morning in plastic with a little sticker that says my name and address on it and people still think that it is trash! I would leave a strongly worded note downstairs but I don’t think it would do any good. No one in my building besides me and my roommates speaks any English. So I am going to do what any good American citizen would do. I am going to set up a secret surveillance camera and catch the culprit and scalp them. I will keep you posted.
In addition, it is Valentines Day. At school today there was a big festival for the vagina monologues. They were playing a video and women through out the school were chanting about there vaginas. It was a lot of fun until I ran into a feminist friend of mine outside. I said “man, it is a real vadge fest in there” she said I have no respect and stormed off. Then I found this article. Although I don’t agree with everything and it comes off a little inconsiderate I think makes some good points.

We are not dead. We just smell funny.

The Good Flame had a great charity show and we are currently waiting for the music video to get finished in post production. The video should turn out great! We did the song “bart the mule” which can be heard at thegoodflame.com. There are some good boner shots of Tobias and some kung fu moves that I choreographed. Also, it takes place in the Australian desert. I was looking at a map and they have three in a sort of club sandwich configuration.
For two thirds of the band school started and is taking up a good chunk of time after subtracting time to drink beer, masturbate to kitty porn (cats silly), and writing new material for a Christmas album that is still in the infant stage. If anyone who reads this is an expert with statistics let me know. I will compensate a free down load of the good flame’s full length album for tutoring. I don’t get the scheffe method when doing a post hoc analysis. Help Me!
I have Tobias reading Atlas Shrugged and as many of you know this book is very important to me. It is fun because he calls me and tells me this and that and then I babble about capitalism and we laugh, cry, and then talk dirty to each other because screwing your mothers has gotten a little old. Well maybe it’s just that your mothers are getting kind of old.
The quality control alliance is flourishing and I am promising you that I will reintegrate myself in the community. I hope everyone remembers me. I am working on a great post I think. It talks about Marx and his view of religion. It is not done yet but I feel great that I can see eye to eye with at least a few of my sociology professors. The Good Flame is also accepting pictures to be judged for our first annual titty of the year award. It does not have to be your own titty but that is preferred. Send all titties to thegoodflamelovesyou@yahoo.com. Talk to you later folks and I will see you over at QCA!

tbone